What you eat in private.... yeah, no, I already know.

What you eat in private, shows in public.

These are words I tell myself, often. Especially when I'm enjoying ice cream, or candy of any kind.. preferably gummy bears or chocolate covered marsh mellows. In case anyone is looking for last minute Valentine's Day gifts for me... you're welcome.
No, don't... please.

Does it stop me? Not much … not like it used to. Not like it should.

Can I just be real with you? Like, legit, raw honesty here?

I am a stress eater. And since about June of 16' I've been more stressed than a 'normal' stressed. The why isn't really important, what's important is I'm destroying my health.. my body and my self esteem.

I pride myself on healthy habits. On exercise. On guiding others to a healthier life.

So, what am I doing to myself? I feel like such a hypocrite.

I read recently in several places... where it said 'Food is medicine'. That fires me up. Because that is NOT true!

But a small part of my mind was like... okay, I can use this... because that's kinda how I've been treating it... medicating myself with food-because of stress.

No. No. No!

That's the enemy. Again.

Food is fuel. Food is a privilege!

Here is a truth bomb. I've put on 30lbs. Yeah, 30lbs of fat. My haters are clapping.

As well as my friends. But for a different reason. My friends are lifting me up right now, and telling me thank you, because I'm being real. They are saying to me, lets do this together girl. We got this!

There is no magic wand. There is only do. Do it.

I have a group going right now on facebook. There are 3 people in it. I'm the only one posting. Sometimes I'm the only person encouraging me. But that's where it starts. With me.

It's not about losing the 30lbs I put back on. It's about being healthy.

It's not about the scale. It's about the feeling. 

It's about the non scale victories. It's about the feeling when your pants slide up... and you don't have to shake em' up.

This is about managing my stress better. Getting back in the gym, just going for a walk. It's about taking care of my temple, because putting garbage in it, is not how we praise God!

I cannot commit to 5am gym times. I cannot commit to 6 days or even 5 days a week to working out. But I can commit to putting down the candy bar. I can commit to making better choices. And by default I can commit to being healthy, again.

Food can be an addiction, like anything else. Caffeine, cigarettes, pills, drugs, etc... and just like those addictions, there is help! Reach out to the people who are clapping because you are being real, and tell them you need to make a change. Watch that circle grow, and watch lives be changed, together.

Each morning I wake up with a grateful heart. I tell God each morning, 'Lord, thank you for my heartbeat today. Thank you for the heartbeat of those I love. Thank you that I have the ability to make a difference, and thank you for the free will to decide.'

xo-

Misty